shoes 5 sizes too small

on niches, truffle pigs and the one thing holding all the walls up

I spent the last 10 years picking a lane. I smooshed my big ass personality (Leo rising and approx. 1 zillion more fire signs in my chart) into a teeny tiny niche and slowly, but surely, I started to feel like I was wearing shoes 5 sizes too small and so I’d burn down my business only to start up the whole process again..

Ok so that’s a VAST oversimplification but my point remains true; I’m no longer available to shrink myself down to one niche, one topic, one area of expertise, one simple by-line to make myself more digestible or more easily understood.

I’m done speaking to people who need me to dumb it down - we’re so DONE with that paradigm and whilst it sounds like I’m bagging it out - truly I’m not. It served me well. Built the million dollar business off the back of it and learned SO MANY THINGS that a masters degree in Business never would have taught me..

And also we’re still done.

celebrated this guys 10th birthday this week - cried approx 5 times because why do they have to keep getting older? 😭

I know the reason I was led down that path is because I’m meant to lead through it - messy, unstructured, unsure of the rocks I’m hoping will magically appear - but step by step, with the happiest, dumbest, biggest smile on my face, because my soul led me here..

And if you’re still here after that rambly-ass intro, my guess is; your soul led you down that path too. And I couldn’t be MORE jazzed (I’m still smiling ear to ear like an idiot over here) to walk this path with you.

I have a really good feeling that things are about to get really bloody good for you and I..

So I want to walk you down a little path of what to expect… because as random as I thought my interests, experience and the 50 lives I’ve lived are.. I recently realised there’s a REALLY big through-line, that now feels so bloody obvious, I can’t believe I didn’t see it before.

Here’s what I’ve realised (and honestly the fact that I double majored in Psychology + Philosophy - I should have seen this coming) after over 20 years in the health and self-development industry..

The problem isn’t that we don’t know WHAT to do, the problem is that we keep searching outside of ourselves for the answer..

We’re currently in one big ass epidemic of lack of trust, and the biggest through-line that you’ll find here is that I want us each to come back to our power, our sovereignty, our intuition and the WELL of knowledge we all have within us.

This is the space where I’m rebuilding and hopefully you’ll feel this too; self-trust. In the body, the family, the abundance and the soul - after a lifetime of being taught to abandon it.

I want to be so clear about WHY I share the way I do:

I’ve walked through the trenches - not so you don’t. I would never want to take that kind of transformation away from you. But so you can guide yourself through it all and know that you’re never alone.. feel hopefully a bit more grounded, a lot less unsure, and in more capacity to hold yourself through the beautiful - and what will require the brave.

That’s the whole thing. That’s the house we’re building here together.. Now let me show you the four rooms.

pick a door, any door….

room one: the real spiritual path

not the love-and-light version.. ICK, the way I wanna GAG when I see the whitewashed versions of this.

This is the real one - the one where awakening costs you relationships, certainty and, for a while, your ability to look sane to the people around you. ‘GOODIE’ - I hear you cheer. Promise it’s worth it x 10000.

Those of us called to usher in the new paradigm usually get initiated through some SHITT first - and this isn’t a justification of suffering, it’s embodiment.

How can we REALLY know what it feels like to be abundant unless we’ve had everything stripped from us, and still found that feeling within??

We’re not just magical feminine goddesses over here - though we are that too - we’re light warriors, heavier on the warrior part than I ever imagined tbh..

This is where I’ll keep sharing my journey of following my soul’s alignment, intuition, co-creating with God/Universe/Source and the dark that enables us to see the light.

room two: the body as the living experiment

I’ve been fascinated with the body and my health as long as I can remember. Probably partially due to silly amounts of trauma that fried my nervous system by the time I turned 16, my disordered eating in my 20’s and then that fun chapter where I spent the next twenty years being turned away and gaslit by approximately one million doctors..

And that was all before I finally got to the root of my health issues and grand-slammed myself a chronic illness diagnosis.

So ya, after writing that, my borderline psychotic amount of research and my fascination with the innate healing capabilities of the human body - kinda make sense..

This is where I share my on-going experiments in real time - the peptides, the protocols, the microdosing, the nervous system work, the energy work.

All rigorously researched AND intuition-led, because I refuse to choose between the two.

Did I mention it’s a LIVE experiment: currently seeing if I can actually shrink my adenomyosis and how I can apply Joe Dispenza’s work to a whole new level on this bod (part four of the healing series is coming). I genuinely don’t know how it ends. You’ll find out as soon as I do!

room three: grief, generational trauma and becoming the difficult one

This one, is the hardest room to write if I’m honest because I’m still figuring out what it looks like, what’s mine to share and also I’m still putting some of the pieces together myself - and also I see this is exactly why it belongs here.

My experience with all of these seem to not fit the socially accepted definition of each, and there’s still a pretty big pandora’s box on the second that I’m slowly (carefully) opening. Some of these will be reserved for my paid subscribers for the safety of my heart..

Because this is the room where I share the things we’re reaalllyy not supposed to say out loud. But again - Leo rising so we’re doing it anyway.

room four: the rewrite

I’ll just spit this one out: MY LOVES - the era of self-sacrifice under the veil of service is dead. I buried that mofo doowwwnnn.

Along with the business model that ran on my energy as the main currency and deeply appreciated my long ingrained need to please. She’s no longer with us.

This room is the chapter for what comes after:

It’s where we re-write what it looks like to receive by being YOU.. where we only take on projects, opportunities and next steps that come from a full body and soul YES (even if it scares us - which it of course will - more than anything before).

This is where I’ll share the building of the new paradigm, in real time, mistakes and all, never knowing how it’s going to work out but tapping back into trust regardless.

This is another live experiment - clearly my favourite kind, I don’t know how this one ends either, that’s the whole ass point.


what this actually means for you…

Well, that felt like a telescope into the depths of my heart and soul. We’re moving from quite the half-ass posting schedule if I’m gonna be really real with you, to you being as caught up with my inner world as humanly possible - consider yourself warned..

And my paid subscribers? You get the rawest rooms, plus the actual rituals, protocols and practices.. the stuff I can’t put anywhere else.

Ok here’s what I REALLY want to know:

Which room are you walking into first? Kinda like those ‘choose your own adventure’ books we had in the 90s - anyone remember those?? Tell me in the comments. genuinely. It helps me know what to write more of and it helps me get to know YOU even more, which is my entire raison d’être..

and while you’re down there..

Tell me your flavour of intuition. Are you a truffle pig like me? Nose down, digging for the thing underneath the thing? Or are you the eagle - the one who sees the land and the ocean at the same time?

xx elise

P.S. I’m gearing up to share a BIG one with you at the end of this month. It involves celebrating my 2 year anniversary of going no-contact with my mum, and the date happens to land on both our birthdays.. Whew just writing that makes my stomach drop. Stay tuned.